A day at the NAC

Yesterday was the big day - our first real day of adoption business in Ukraine. Our train from Odessa arrived in Kiev at 8:32 AM and we met Kostya for the first time. He took us to the apartment, where we had the opportunity to shower and get ready for our appointment, which was scheduled for 11:30.

The NAC was a short walk from our appointment (short by Ukrainian standards, anyways - we walk everywhere, and a 20 minute walk is nothing!). We arrived about 10:45, just to be early, in case anyone didn't show, or they were running ahead of time.

We waited outside the actual office, on the wide stair landing. There were several chairs, and when we first arrived, there were two other couples also waiting. The one couple, Eric and Shannon, a lovely pair from Florida we met on the our Amsterdam-Kiev flight, was back to finalize their referral. Their appointment had been the morning before. However, the NAC workers couldn't get ahold of the orphanage director for the children they had chosen, so they had returned to get final information to make a decision about going to visit these children (which they did decide to do). The other couple was not from the US - if I had to guess I would say France, but I'm not sure. While we were waiting, another US couple and a couple from Spain arrived as well.

During the waiting time, Kostya kept going in and out of the office several times to check on the progress of appointments. At right about 11:25 we were invited inside, walked down the hallway to the meeting room of the NAC. We waited only long enough to look at the various pictures of children families had adopted in previous years and months.

We then were invited into the room. It was a large size room, with three desks. There was a NAC counselor sitting at each desk. We sat at the desk closest to the window, and as we sat down, the counselor asked if we minded having the AC turned on! Apparently, she told us, some Ukrainians don't care for AC, so she always asks! We were quite happy to have the AC on throughout the entire appointment.

Our counselor was a very nice young woman. I would guess that she was probably 25 years old and was extremely personable. She started out by mentioning that we were so young (looking!), and then asked if we were brother and sister. We made our introductions - we showed her our photo album (some of the key pages), listed some of the things we enjoy doing as a family, and then said we hoped to adopt a sibling group of 2-3 children. She asked about the ages of the children, and we explained that we were hoping to find a sibling group that would keep the age gap small between Lillia and Anabella.

After a few moments of thought, she told us we could start by looking at the sibling books (brought 2 over), the young child book (to see if any of them had siblings, but hadn't been switched to the sibling book). She also asked if we had two dossiers, and when she found out we did, she said we could start with siblings, but then also possibly look at two unrelated if we didn't find what we were looking for. She seemed to go out of her way to be helpful and kind and really assisted us in looking for children. She kept going between her desk and the cabinet of binders to pull out other pages. She also asked the other counselors if they had any thoughts on what group might fit our choices.

We were at the NAC looking at binders for two hours, and had to leave because it was past her lunch break. When at one point, we were feeling stressed about making a decision, she said "take your time, look". Only at the very end, when it was past her lunch break time, did we feel some sense of urgency. She did tell us however, that we could come back after she was back from lunch.

Looking through the binders of children was very difficult. We had a very broad range of children that we had in mind, so it was difficult to narrow down the sibling groups. There are many children that are within the 8-10 age range. Two groups of children we were initially interested in, were both vacationing in Spain for the summer, and wouldn't be back until September.

It was amazing to us how much our counselor knew about so many of the children. She would just see the picture, and know information about them right away. She also kept thinking of specific children that might fit our specifications, and would work to find them in the various binders.

We went to lunch with our pile narrowed down, but not a real sense of who to go visit. Lunch was a long affair, as our minds were burdened with a real decision. We really thought the children that God intends for our family would "jump out" at us, and the two groups that seemed to do that were in Spain! We were in a real quandry as to what to do, and I'm sure we were very bad company as we muddled through everything we had just experienced. We weren't very prepared (although I'm not sure how you could be) for the difficulty in choosing children from the binders. There are pages after pages, and the pictures begin blurring together. While you don't want to rashly make a decision, a decision must indeed be made.

As we left the NAC for lunch, we had two different sibling groups we had somewhat narrowed it down to. The counselors were going to call the orphanage directors to get more current information for us, when the returned from lunch. As we talked, however, another group that we had actually been told about first from Eric and Shannon, then from Eric and Shannon's faciltator, then from our counselor, then from another counselor, kept coming back to mind. This group was also from Odessa region, which we had discussed several months ago might be nice, as many of our Ukrainian friends are from Odessa. So, we made a decision as we returned to the NAC. Kostya went inside to tell the counselor, and the weight lifted immediately off our shoulders. It was all I could do not to cry, and once again, the smiles and joy returned when we felt our decision was right.

Today, however, Kostya got a phone call. There was a problem at the NAC with our paperwork. Our homestudy only approves us for a certain number of children, our the sibling group is one more than that. They will not give us permission to even visit the children until they have an amended homestudy and corrected BCIS (immigration) form. We waited until late this afternoon to call our social worker. She has been amenable and wonderful through the entire process, we thought surely it would be no problem...

Her answering machine said she was out of town until August 5th.

We called the director's office of the agency who wrote our homestudy. No answer.

So, now we are at a crossroads. We cannot visit the children until we have the update. Do we request another appointment and look through the binders, thinking that these children weren't intended for our family - after all, aren't all these problems a sign? Or, are these roadblocks simply a test for us, and we are stay strong and persevere? We have already, in some regards, become attached to these children. We have their names and birthdates in our book, and have talked about them so much already. Letting go of them even now seems difficult...

And, so, we close this journal entry requesting your prayers. Please pray that we overcome this paperwork hurdle quickly. Of, if these children are not the ones God intends for us to bring home, pray that God removes the love and attachment that are already forming for them.

Thank you! God bless!

With love, Kristen and John